What Is My Trigger?

Image of head silhouette containing gears symbolizing an emotional trigger

“What is my trigger?” may seem like a random question and you could be wondering where I am going with this post. I assure you that this is one of the best questions you can ask yourself when you are going through a rough time or even when you are having a bad day. I like to call it the 3 steps to emotional awareness.

Every week I meet new people and I come across different people who very often ask the same question: “Why do I feel sad for no reason?” Or “I have been so angry lately and I have no idea why?” We all struggle with questions like these and I want to give you a practical tool in helping you with these types of questions.

Get to the Root

Firstly, we always want to get to the root cause of a problem to be able to understand what is going on, work through it and let it go. For that reason, we need to identify the root cause or trigger. Ask yourself what could have triggered these emotions? Was it something that someone said to me or about me that triggered these feelings? Have I been under a lot of stress lately that has contributed to these overwhelming feelings of sadness or anger? Or perhaps you experienced a traumatic event in the past, which you have not completely dealt with yet? Once the root cause has been identified, understanding why you are feeling a certain way will enable you to work through that moment and then easily let go of the emotion.

Be Practical

The second step is to work through it or to do practical things in overcoming this trigger. Sometimes we cannot work through it at the time, so acknowledging and embracing the emotion in that moment is the best way to get through it. Be mindful.

For example, let’s say you have been anxious for a few days and you realised that the anxiety was due to something someone said, 3 days ago, which triggered an anxious response within you. You can go back in your mind and think about what that person said and ask yourself why that specific topic made you anxious?  Maybe then you figure out that subconsciously you made a connection with the shared story, due to your own past experience which helps you make sense of the emotions you are feeling. Just by acknowledging the negative emotion, it does something in the mind, where one either feels much better or the emotion no longer brings a sense of anxiety.

Let it Go

Now that you have identified the trigger and you have worked through the emotion or have acknowledged and embraced the emotion, the third step is to let it pass or let it go.

Let’s say you acknowledged that your anxiety was caused by an event in the past that hurt you, and you want to let it go . Consequently, the only way you can fully deal with the hurt is to face the negative emotion. The technique used here would be Time Line Healing, a powerful and effective way to get rid of negative emotions. For more information on Time Line Healing, or if you would like Time Line Healing, please contact me and together we will work through your needs. Please note that a Time Line Healing Practitioner should conduct Time Line Healing as a guided process is much easier to follow. I know it would be a lot easier if you could do it all by yourself!

Sometimes step 3 is not necessary (Time Line Healing) and by embracing the feeling and the emotion, they will pass. Therefore, rather embrace and acknowledge the emotion, otherwise you will suppress the negative emotion. Suppressed negative emotions stay in your mind/body and cause diseases and internal conflict.

If for any reason you cannot figure out a root cause or trigger to how you are feeling, it could be a hormonal response or a lack of nutrition. If the root cause to your negative feelings is due to a past traumatic event and you do not know how to overcome it, please contact me.

Live Abundantly

This 3 step process is a wonderful tool and assists you in becoming more aware of your feelings and solutions to those emotions. You can use this tool in any situation and with any emotion. None of us have to be a victim of our circumstances or of our emotions. We were created to live life to the fullest and in abundance! Limitless living!

 

Do You Know Perfect Lily?

Freedom from anxiety and pressures that we put on ourselves when we strive for perfection.

Have you ever met perfect Lily? Lily has always been the perfect person, never failing at anything and everyone just loves her! You think to yourself “If only I was more like Lily! If only I could do just as well as Lily does at Maths, or I wish I could be more sporty or more musical. Lily is just perfect! She looks amazing, she can eat anything she wants and doesn’t even put on weight! She has had a wonderful upbringing, she has so many friends and even the guys love her!” I am certain that all of us have had similar thoughts like the ones above.

Well to tell you the truth, Lily is not doing as well as you think. All of the pressure of being that skinny girl, the sporty one, the musical one and the one everybody loves, is getting to her. She is no longer coping in life. Anxiety and exhaustion are a constant factor in her life, the fear of failure plagues her, her desperate need for approval and acceptance is all she can think about; and to keep up with the perceptions people have of her, she abuses her body to look thin and perfect.

The thoughts that go through her head daily are “I need to be better, I need to be thinner, I need to be more acceptable, I need to be who everybody thinks I am! The worst of all is that people think I am happy and perfect, when in fact I am suffering from anorexia and the need for love. I would not wish this on anybody! In fact, I think suicide is the only answer.”

It seems now that Lily is not so perfect anymore. Why are you comparing yourself to Lily? “Lily” can be anyone or anything that you think is better than you are. What do they have that you don’t have? What price have they paid to get it and would you pay the same price? You are incomparable because there is no one else in the world like you! How can you begin to compare yourself to someone else who has a totally difference genetic structure, a different perception of the world, different strengths, different weaknesses and difference beliefs? You complete a piece of the puzzle in this world and only you can fill that space! Believe in yourself!

Luckily Lily identified that she needed help and she contacted someone who could help her. The right skills, coping mechanisms and techniques were given to her that she needed in order to cope with the anxiety and fear of failure. Lily has moved from an unhealthy situation into a space of self-love and acceptance. Perhaps you know “a Lily” or you wish to be like “Lily”. Remember that you are victorious and an overcomer.

Contact Us now to book a coaching session, so you can be your own Lily.

Limitless Living!